Been gone too long

I just noticed that I haven’t posted anything since week 6!  It’s been a tough windy road so far.  I can’t say things are getting better in terms of the sickness (which I hear is a good thing!) but I can say I’m learning to just “deal with it”.  At first it was horrible.  I didn’t know the first thing about dealing with being nauseous and depressed because I couldn’t exercise.  Thank god I found what I call the “magic pill” or I don’t know how I would get through my days or eat anything.  My morning sickness pill is my saving grace.  At first, I only took it when I thought I really really needed it.  Now I don’t even think twice when I pop the pill along with my others in the morning first thing.  Last week we made it through week 8.  It was almost the exact same as 7.  I took my pill every single day last week because I had 3 very long days at work last week, 3 lunch dates, and had to be around tons of people so I knew I had to hold it together.  Monday and Tuesday were long days.  Worked from 8am-730pm.  I also had lunch with a friend at Noodles and Co. on Tuesday.  I got the spaghetti and meatballs.  Let’s just say I should have gone with the mac and cheese.   I think my husband is loving pregnant me because I eat things I wouldn’t ever normally eat and then he gets to reap the benefits of the leftovers.  He got some meatballs and spaghetti later 🙂 Wednesday wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be.  My boss surprised me with lunch and a 1/2 day.  The only problem with lunch was that it was with another co-worker who doesn’t’ know I’m pregnant and it was Mexican food which sounds absolutely terrible to me.  So, of course, I popped my magic pill and out I went.  I ended up with the bean burrito with a side of re-friend beans and rice.  I finished my sides but most of the burrito went home to my husband.  That afternoon I actually felt semi good and so I stopped by Walgreens to fill some prescriptions.  While there I bought some candy…gummy worms and runts.  What, they sounded good!  I also called my husband to find out how he was feeling (he stayed home sick that day) and he asked me to pick up some chocolate ice cream.  We ended up with Rocky road.  I actually tried some when I got home and it tasted magical.   I didn’t eat much after that and laid on the couch until bedtime at 9:30pm.  Sad.  Thursday was another trying day as I was at work until 7:30pm again but I got Friday off for working so many hours last week!  Friday I tried not to take a pill and I even RAN 3 miles!  I was in a pretty great mood on Friday night suffice to say.  I did take a pill right before we went to dinner just so I wouldn’t be grossed out by the food and so I could actually get through the evening.  I also gave myself a mini shopping spree at Ross (dress for less).  I haven’t shopped since August of last year so it feels really good to have some new clothes to sport around this week.  Time to do a little fall cleaning of my wardrobe and pass the old clothes onto Good Will.

This weekend we went on a mini vacation with my parents to Estes Park.  It was really nice to just get away and do something different after weeks of sitting here in Denver watching me be low on energy and sickly.  We went up to Ft. Collins to have lunch and I was able to get down 1/2 a portable mushroom sandwich and fries.  Fries and pizza have been consistently sounding good.  We then headed to my grandpa’s land outside of Ft. Collins and spent about 1.5 hours there just enjoying the landscape.  From there we headed to Estes.  We had every in intention of spending the night up there but after my mom had called 11 places that morning and we drove by about 7 places that read “no vacancy” we were beginning to think we’d be heading back to Denver after dinner.  We actually spotted a place that read “vacancy” and hoped on the opportunity to stay there.  It ended up working out nicely.  They even allowed dogs!  It was cheap and we got rooms that were right next to each other.  The place was very kitschy but that’s Estes for you.  We thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.  We had cheese and crackers in my parents room then headed to dinner.  We had to work up an appetite as we weren’t really hungry at all.  None of the places were really standing out to us but we ended at the Grubsteak.  It seemed to have enough choices but I told everyone not to worry about me and my food needs.  I ended up with the chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes.  Um, I definitely won the best tasting dinner.  This hit the spot!  Of course afterwards I felt like a complete cow but I’m learning to just go with it.  I did end up doing 60 min. on the elliptical Sat. morning so I wasn’t too concerned.  I even tried my hand at some peanut butter chocolate ice cream.  I had to throw most of that away though.  I’m still having pretty bad aversions to sugar.  The next morning we went out to breakfast and weren’t seated until 11am.   We waited almost an hour for our seating and food but I think it was worth the wait.  I’m actually surprised I was able to wait that long for food.  I got biscuits and gravy with buttered grits.  It was all perfect.  We were all stuffed afterwards and of course my folks wanted to hike.  Chad and I were in no mood so we walked the few steps it took to get to the falls and let my parents keep going.  We sat and actually talked to a nice couple who had a 2 month old with them.  It was pretty inspirational.  I was actually going downhill pretty quickly so I’m glad we weren’t there forever.  When my parents got back we drove down to do some Elk watching and to our surprise actually got to see some!  By this point it was about 2pm and time to head back down to Denver.  We had to stop on the way home for me to grab a sandwich but of course there were no vegetarian options anywhere.  We looked at 4 different places before I finally just had to make a decision.  I ended with the BLT. Hit the spot again.  When we got home I had every intention of taking the dog for a long walk to burn off some of that gravy but I went downhill pretty quickly and ended up on the couch from about the time we got home until bed time.  I’m so sick of my lifestyle I could cry but every day I survive, I remind myself, it’s one day closer to meeting our babies.  I want to just cry most of the time because this first trimester thing just isn’t me but I feel lucky that I don’t feel well.  I think if I didn’t feel like this I’d be even more paranoid then I already am.  I’m hoping the 9th week will sail by because next week we have our 10 week ultrasound to see what is going on in there!!!!!  I can’t wait to see them again and the little heartbeats!

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6 week update

Today marks the last day of week 6.  Tomorrow I cruise onto week 7.  I’ve decided to do weekly postings at the end of each week of pregnancy to document exactly what I’ve been through in that week.  Seems more appropriate than starting at the beginning of a week.  This week has been monumental for numerous reasons.  Let’s start with last Tuesday.  Well, 9/6/2011 marked being pregnant for exactly one week longer than last time!  We were pretty stoked about that idea.  That being said, I felt HORRIBLE last week.  I mean terrible.  I didn’t throw up and still have yet to do so but I am in a constant state of nausea.  Not even eating is helping anymore.  It’s just a constant feeling like I’m going to throw up.  I think many “normal” people in my condition would have already puked several times by now but I’m so terrified of throwing up that I will, at any cost, keep from doing this.  I remember Tuesday was just a milestone to get through work.  Thank goodness my boss wasn’t in that day so I did end up leaving  a tad bit early.  Wednesday I still felt like complete crap but managed to force myself to walk the dog after work.  I have been getting NO exercise in which is freaking me out.  Even walking seems like a completely impossible task sometimes.  Now for the good stuff….

Thursday.  We got to sleep in on Thursday due to our FIRST ultrasound!!!  It felt so good to sleep in.  I didn’t want to get out of bed because I knew the minute that I would, I’d start feeling sick.  Sure enough…Sick.  So I made waffles and then took the dog on a 3 mile walk.  It did NOT feel good at all but it’s what I wanted to do.  When I got back I quickly got ready for the ultrasound and work afterwards.  When we got to the doctor we were pretty much seen right away.  We went back to a dark ultrasounds room.  It was actually pretty funny to see my husband totally freak out when I got completely naked from the waste down.  He was pretty sure I was not supposed to be so exposed.  Little did he know….

The ultrasound tech and a student came in to do the ultrasound.  Sure enough, it was a vaginal ultrasound and so they HAD to get up my hoo-ha to see what was going on.  Chad was alarmed and shocked that this is what an early ultrasound was like.  I think he always imagined them being a ultrasounds with goo and bellies.  Never this invasive.  Luckily I had already done one of these a few months prior when I had my miscarriage so I knew it was coming.

Next the ultrasound tech. went straight in and almost immediately says “I see kiddos.”  Very VERY nonchalantly.  Now, I was sort of expecting this too as my ob had told me a few weeks ago that my hcg levels looked “twin-ish” but nothing can prepare you for what we were about to find out for real.  Chad asked her to back up and says “wait, kiddos?!  As in TWO!?”  And she said “yes, there are two in there.”   I remember just saying “what the fu**” and I am pretty sure chad said “sh**”.  The next thing I new I knew, Chad was grabbing my hands and squeezing them.  I’m not sure if he was tearing up but I sure was.  This was either a beautiful thing that I was so proud of or complete and utter terror.  Either way I was crying.  I wasn’t sure what to think next.  Both of us just had a “no way” look on our faces throughout the rest of the ultrasound.  Of course the tech and student both congratulated us.  We just kept responding “thanks?” as if we weren’t sure if this was supposed to be a moment of congratulatory remarks or a moment in which to create an upheaval and yell inappropriate remarks about how this could happen.  We were then left alone to get dressed and embraced each other.  While we were both in shock we also took the news in stride and were very happy.  The u/s tech came back with photos of the babies and we each were able to get a copy.  As of that moment we were proud owners of our first picture with Baby A and Baby B.

We then met with my doc. who was so incredibly surprised.  We asked a few questions but really got no definitive answers.  I am guessing that they can’t really do anything for you until after week 12.  Right now we are just in the waiting game.  I’m pretty scared still every time I use the restroom preparing myself to see blood every time I wipe.  Every wipe that there is no blood, I am thankful for.

After the ultrasound and meeting with the doc. we discussed how we were going to tell our families.  They already knew that we were pregnant as we didn’t want to hold anything back this time or make a big deal out of this one knowing that we could just as easily loose this one.  We kept it pretty low key when telling our parents with a quick phone call and a “I got another positive pregnancy test”.  So with this news we wanted to do something big.  We decided to skype with our families and before skyping we would email them the pic. of the ultrasound.  We wanted to watch their reactions as they opened the email and figured it out for themselves what was going on.  Thursday was one of the longest days of my life because I was just so excited to get home and tell our news to everyone.

We had a skype date first with Chad’s parents.  The times were a bit confused.  We thought we had made it for 6pm when they thought 6:30pm.  So waiting with baited breath we called only to find no one on the other end.  Chad called his dad and realized they were still out biking and thought the date was at 6:30.  Great…Who else can we call asap!!?  Chad’s sister…We called her and she was JUST sitting down to dinner.  Ugh.  So I called my mom and asked her where she was.  She was.  She was close!  I told her to stop by to see the picture. She rushed over and we showed her the twins.  I had told her and the rest of my family about my abnormally high risking hcg levels so she sort of already suspected it was twins but non the less she was thrilled.  The next call was finally to Chad’s parents who knew nothing.  We got on the call with them and made small talk for a bit while we waited patiently for them to open the email of the sonogram.  FINALLY they got it and opened it…We sat and watched their faces as they opened the email and just ooed and awed our little babies.  Turns out they had NO idea there were two there.  They were very focused on “baby b”.  As they kept commenting on how lovely baby b was.  Then Chad asked them to look closer and see if there was anything else…SCREAMS of joy and laughter and shock arose as they realized that there were TWO little bubbles in the picture.  I know that their reaction to this news will forever be one of my favorite memories of them.  Pretty sure Chad and I got teary at this point too.  His sister was next and had a more panicked shocked reaction.  It was hilarious.  She just kept asking “are you serious!?”.  She called her husband in the room to take a look and he just started laughing.  They had pretty great reactions as well.  The next call was to my brother.  He opened the email and didn’t even study the picture.  He immediately said “wow, so you’re having twins”.  Again, he already knew there may be a slight chance of that happening.  Because my dad is completely computer illiterate, my mom had to facilitate him opening up his email.  His reaction “cool, twins”.  He later called the next morning and told me the news hadn’t quite hit him but that he was also thrilled at the prospect of having not one but two grandchildren.

I am assuming this is why I have felt crappy since about week 5.  My doctor prescribed me some Zofran to help ease my nausea.  I’m a little nervous to take it as I don’t want to do anything to harm my babies but the time came where the morning sickness felt so bad on Thursday night and all day Friday and then again on Saturday morning that I couldn’t take it any longer.  I scarfed a pill and decided it was shear joy and magic.  I’m in love with what my husband has named “Zo-friend”.  I am trying not to take it often, only when I absolutely need it (again, today was one of those days as I’m back at work and can barely get through the day).  I’m hoping that I can do it every other day.  I did get to work out on the elliptical for almost an hour both Sat. and Sun. this weekend because of the stuff.  I’m not sure how I’m going to work out anymore during a workday though unless I take time off.  I can’t stomach it in the morning, not enough time or equipment at lunch, and I’m too tired at night.  Hey at least I have the morning sickness under control!  Now, if I can just stop leaving my pills at home and forgetting to take them I’ll be on a semi-close path to success.

Burritos and soup

I’m in week 6 of my pregnancy so far.  The morning sickness started last Wednesday and has not let up.  This is fantastic but also really really hard for me.  I’m super excited about morning sickness because I’ve heard that it’s a sign of a healthy pregnancy.  However, I have no run since last Friday and almost everything sounds horrible to me.  I’m waiting for the time to come when I throw up.  Today I almost did.  The only time I feel “normal” is when I’m eating something that sounds good.  Here is my week in review:

Wednesday-all systems go!  Full on morning sickness ALL DAY.

Thursday-Much of the same although I was able to force myself to run.  I ran 6 miles in the am and then got to work and ate chicken noodle soup with 2 pieces of toast.  Hit the spot.  The rest of the day was spent wondering how I was going to make it through.  I met my brother and his gf for lunch and was able to stomach a side salad and a cup of navy bean soup.  Later that night I had homemade french onion soup and toast.  Can’t stomach sweets at all.

Friday-I was able to run 7 miles Friday am.  I got to work and was able to enjoy some more soup.  Lunch was out with my boss and I was able to get down sweet potato fries and french onion soup topped with cheese and bread.  I really enjoyed it from last night so thought I’d try it out again.  I was really craving oranges so I also scarfed two of those down.  We bought a bunch of clementines because I thought those would settle my stomach but no such luck.  I haven’t touched them.  They sound like barf.  I also craved, no had to have a bean and cheese burrito from taco bell.

Saturday-symptoms gone!  I felt wonderful!!  We went camping with friends over the weekend at the Sand dunes and I was able to hike to the top no problem.  I also ate a breakfast casserole for breakfast, tons of chips, dips, and veggies for lunch (and even a few bites of brownie for dessert) and then had what we brought for dinner!  We had flank steak, two types of salads, and some pork that our friends brought to share.  Everything was wonderful and all sat really well with me!  I even had bloody mary mix to sip on and cheese cubes as an appetizer.  I went on a 4 mile walk and then another 1 mile hike with everyone.  I almost forgot I was pregnant!

Sunday-Dooms day.  All symptoms back in full force.  I woke up thinking I was going to vomit.  The group was making eggs and bacon and I could barely look at the stuff.  Luckily we had packets of instant maple and brown sugar oatmeal so I made some of that and quickly ate it.  My stomach was better after that so I also had a few strips of bacon.  On our way back I munched on cheesy white cheeto puffs and then got to my folks house and NOTHING sounded good.  Everything looked and sounded awful.  My mom made me some Lipton’s noodle soup and that def. helped.  Later I snacked on some cheddar bunnies and goldfish before my dinner of homemade chicken vegetable soup (thanks ma!!  You are the BEST!).  I ended up catching a second wind and had some brownies and played cards until almost 11pm!

Monday-The worst day yet.  I woke up again feeling terrible.  All I could think about were biscuits so my amazing husband quickly shot out of bed and made some for me.  They sure hit the spot.  I thought I’d be able to go for an 8 mile run.  Yeah right!  I could barely make it off the couch to shower.  I did drag myself off the couch to shower and get dressed as we had errands to run.  We went to Target and Petsmart and then it was lunch time.  All of a sudden I wanted nothing but Bravo’s minestrone soup.  Chad suggested maybe something a little cheaper so we were all set to go to Olive Garden until I had to have Panera.  We sped over there as quickly as we could and I got chicken noodle soup w/a baguette for my side.  Of course my husbands choice looked way better than mine (broccoli cheddar) and because he’s been so amazing about all these food mood swings he instantly offered his soup up to me (thanks Chaddy!  I owe you one!).  I felt better after that but then as soon as we got home I felt like I had the flu and was on the couch then quickly migrated to our bed for about 2 hours.  When I finally felt better we decided to take a walk.  We got 2.5 miles in so I will count that as a win.  We decided to stop by the store because all day I had been talking about white rice and sweet and sour sauce for dinner.  Chad went in and made his purchase and as quickly as he went in and bought the stuff I changed my mind and wanted spaghetti squash with marinara sauce.  Thank god he loves me because he didn’t even pause.  He marched straight back into the store and that’s what he got.  We ended up having that for dinner and it was great.

Tuesday-Back to work.  I wasn’t sure how I was going to handle this but my new fitness goal is to walk up to 5-7 miles a day.  I walked the pup 2 miles in the am and thought about what I wanted for breakfast.  Of course, nothing sounded good.  I ended up making more biscuits.  When lunch time rolled around I again was completely indecisive and ended up walking to Safeway and purchasing a bunch of soup and burritos.  The burrito won.  I also got a brown cow vanilla yogurt that totally hit the spot.  When I got home I made myself that white rice with sweet and sour sauce and then a tortilla with cheese.  Also hit the spot.

Today-Same story.  I woke up again feeling sick but took the dog for her 2 mile walk.  I again felt sick thinking about what sounded good for breakfast and when I got home told Chad I had to have a hot pocket with ham and cheese.  Unfortunately whole foods doesn’t have those so he settled for second best and got 2 breakfast sandwiches; one made with a bagel, egg and cheese, the other made with an English muffin, egg and cheese.  The immediately gravitated towards the English muffin one and then was still hungry after it was gone so Chad shared the rest of his bagel one with me 🙂  Bam!  hit the spot.  Lunch was split pea soup another burrito and now I’m sitting here contemplating what in the world I could possibly want for dinner as everything sounds like throw up to me right now.

I swear, in the last week I’ve eaten more processed food and exercised less than I have in my entire life and you know what?  I just don’t care!  I have never felt this way and it’s actually sort of freeing.  I’d love to be able to run again and eat vegetables but right now I feel blessed to just get something down!  I’m definitely taking this pregnancy day by day.  I’m very thankful for all my horrid symptoms.  The one thing I’m not feeling is overly fatigued.  I think in part that has to do with my lack of exercise.  I walk around tired all the time pre-pregnancy so this whole pregnancy thing is probably a blessing in disguise for my over exercised body.  While I don’t feel 100% on the sickness front, I do think that getting ample amounts of sleep is helping tremendously and not pushing my body to do 7, 8, or 10 miles a day doesn’t hurt either.  I am however looking forward to a possible gym membership in my second trimester.

And so it begins

That’s right.  Morning sickness, feeling tired all the time, breast tenderness.  And you know what?  I couldn’t be more excited about all of these new feelings!  Does it suck?  Totally.  I hate feeling “off” or sick all the time but I’ll take it.  Every food aversion I have reminds me of our baby sapping the nutrients and energy right now of me.  I’ll share.  The more that little embryo takes the happier I am 🙂

I did not go running yesterday.  We had a very full day.  It was my husband’s birthday yesterday and he finally caught up to my age!  That’s right, 29!  I’m a cradle robber for sure but I couldn’t be more ok with that.  We had an early morning car appointment so he dropped me off at 7am for work.  I woke up and NOTHING sounded good.  Well, scrambled eggs with cheese sounded good so that’s what I ate.  The no running thing yesterday made me feel like a beached whale and because I have the greatest husband in the whole world, he assured me that I still looked “hot”.  I felt pretty bad all morning and my two favorite things in the world, coffee and gum, made me absolutely sick to my stomach.  We went out for salad for lunch and that was pretty damn tasty.  I also had a few bites of chocolate brownie and carrot cake.  Both went down smoothly.  When it was time to pick me up at 3:30pm I thought I was going to fall asleep on the way to the car.  I was SO tired.  We got home and Chad had already made his bday dinner of sloppy joes.

Sloppy Joes!

He sure knows how to make a mean sloppy joe.  I hate sloppy joes but these were amazing!  I’m pretty sure I gained about 4 lbs last night b/c I weighed myself today and the scale wasn’t pretty.  I blame it on pregnancy.  Anyways, after eating and a nice relaxing bath and massage for my bday boy, we watched our new favorite addiction madmen then went for an ice cream surprise dessert.  When we got there Chad told me what he wanted so I went in and ordered then ordered a slice of choc. cake too.  The man said he’d decorate it and put happy bday on it for Chad with a candle.  He also told me it came with a scoop of ice cream.  I caved and can never turn down free food so I got the ice cream.  I took one look at it and gagged.  We went back to the house to put my ice cream away then finished our walk.  All and all I’d say it was a successful birthday!  Happy birthday to the best Mr. I know!!